Boss versus friend
One of the first few things I learned in my stint as a manager is this – always maintain that line between being a manager and a friend. It can be a mucky thing eventually, especially when things go awry professionally. People would start looking for personal concessions because of the “friendship.”
Here’s a great article over at Fortune CNN on this issue containing an insightful excerpt from The 3 Imperatives for Becoming a Great Leader. It practically sums up the differences between friend and manager that simply won’t go hand in hand:
- Friendship exists for itself
- Friends are equals
- Friends accept each other as they are
- Friends don’t check up on each other all the time
- As practical matter, you cannot be friends with all your people equally
- Another paradox: Caring even close, but focused on the work
- Why it’s hard to get the relationship right and keep it right
The level of familiarity that friendship introduces into the boss-subordinate dynamic is a disaster waiting to happen. But that doesn’t mean that you should never try and create positive relationships with the people reporting to you. The most memorable and valued managers I’ve encountered are the ones who have served as mentors.
